Tough Love

"I will bash you until you become an expert."
- Boss

Had a tough week in terms of getting to know what my Boss wants, mixed in with carelessness on my side ><

Story: there were some CAD drawings to be done, and as I'm taking over the job from my colleague, I consulted Boss and then did what he asked me to do.. no less, but also, no more.. And this led to my Boss getting very disappointed because the architect he hired seemed to just be a CAD monkey without helping to think about the design.. huhu.. Part of the dilemma of being a new employee is that I don't know how much more I can add / input before intstead of being praised for initiative I'd be reprimanded for toeing the line or acting smart without actually knowing anything. However, think I gotta get that 'I'm a new employee I'm just here to listen and obey' mindset.. Much as it seems to be a 'humble' and 'safe' approach, it makes me too lazy to think!

Boss: "You are an intelligent girl, so learned, but you are not putting in enough thinking.. So, can I have these by end of next week? Don't be so slow"
me: "But Boss.. Previously I finished in two days, just like you wanted.."
Boss: "Finished means no more changes needed."
me: "Ok..."

That aside, Boss actually asked me whether I think he is a difficult person.. huhuhu.. I didn't know how to answer that, but when he told me that he wants to 'bash me till I become an expert', and when he said I have improved from previous times, I feel spurred on to hang on for dear life and just enjoy the ride. Gotta admit that now I catch myself checking my work a lot to eliminate careless mistakes, and actually think more before doing any design drawing!

If I do manage to stay on for two years, I think my 2013 self will look at my 2011 self with a mix of smugness and pride and said, "Damn you survived, and look where you are now."

But before that, Tough Love!